WAKEshine

Imagine a person who is living his dream life.  For him, living the dream means waking up early and exercising, eating a leisurely breakfast with his family, working on his home business for six hours, having dinner with a friend or a client, practicing the piano, and then having several hours of family time.

He also saves money and goes on mini vacations every quarter, and a long overseas trip once per year.
   
He’s done this successfully for two years now and he’s loving it.

One day he wakes up with a terrible flu.  His body aches and he’s dizzy with a fever.  He spends the entire day in bed, unable to move.

On that day, he doesn’t do anything on his dream life list.  He doesn’t exercise, doesn’t have breakfast with the family…nothing on the list.

Does this mean he’s not living his dream life anymore?

If we asked him "Are you still living your dream life?" he might answer: "Because of circumstances, today doesn’t resemble my dream life, but I still consider myself to be living the dream because I know what my dream is and I’m confident I’ll be back on track again soon."

This is interesting.  A person who is–today–meeting *zero percent* of his dream life goals, and yet feels great about the life he’s living.

Now imagine a guy who’s given up everything today for a deferred dream life.  He works more hours than he enjoys, he doesn’t get to spend time with family or friends, and he’s put everything he loves on hold until he "gets it all together," at which time he’ll start living his dream life.

Let’s ask him if he’s living the dream life.  "My life is miserable.  But one day I hope it will all turn around and I’ll be on easy street."

The problem is, he’s been saying this for years and he’s still–effectively–where he was five years ago.

Or he could have given an even more depressing response: "Don’t even talk to me about the dream life."

We don’t want a deferred dream life.  We don’t want 0% of the dream today to trade off for 100% of the dream in some unspecified future.

We want a dream life today, even if we can accomplish only 10% of it.  Maybe in six months it will be 14%.  And as that percentage goes up, not only are you living more of your dream life, you are also defining and learning what it is and how to accomplish it.

The dream life is something you build, not something that is given to you, or that will land in your lap when you retire.  You have to exercise the muscles now so that they keep getting stronger.  Deferring the dream allows the muscles to get weaker and weaker, and the dream to shift from a symphony to an echo.

I made the choice many years ago that I will get some portion of my dreams accomplished every day.  Family is very important to me, so I give up some things to make sure I have family time.  I love music, so I play in the church band just about every week.  Not the rock band I had dreamed of years ago, but I found the heart of what I love–playing the music, enjoying the spiritual aspect of it, and having fun with other band members–and put it into my life in a way that meets all my priorities.

How do we build the dream life today?

First, admit that it’s a work in progress.  You will have some percentage of it, and you will work toward increasing that percentage day by day, month by month, year by year.

Second, define your wants.  Write them down.  Put them on a post-it note on the mirror.  Tell your family and friends that this is "who you are."

Third, be clear and honest about your priorities.  If, for example, you are currently working a job you don’t particularly like, but you do like getting the steady paycheck, then don’t phrase it like "I hate my job but what are you gonna do?"  Treat it as a tool for achieving your dreams.  "My goal is to have my home business become my sole source of income, and I am getting there by having a steady paycheck for now."

Many things we blame on external factors are actually based on our own wants and needs.  Good, healthy wants and needs.  So you can phrase it like this:

"I wish I could get a job that allows me to be creative but then my pay would go down and I’d have to move to a neighborhood where the schools are no good.  I’m really stuck."

Or you can phrase it like this:

"One of my dreams is for my child to have the best education possible.  I am achieving that dream by living in a great school district.  In order to afford that, I chose a job that gives me a good, steady paycheck.  I fulfill my creative side by working on antique furniture with my family every weekend."

Same situation, but different ways of looking at it. 

But it goes beyond just a state of mind. 

The first viewpoint is a victim mentality where life is against you and there’s nothing you can do about it.  This kind of viewpoint feeds on itself and the world begins to look more and more unfair, and the options seem to dwindle to a smaller and smaller number.

The second viewpoint grows on itself and on the surroundings.  Because you acknowledge your needs and act on them, you are increasing your ability to improve your environment and to have success.  You are living the dream today.  You haven’t arrived at the destination yet, but you are on the right road toward greater and greater success and satisfaction.

Start paying attention to why you do what you do.  Acknowledge your priorities and desires.  Look at how your lifestyle is accomplishing what you want and then start looking for ways to get rid of the deadwood and increase the parts you like.  If your lifestyle is meeting only 9% of your dream life, celebrate that and start thinking of how to turn that into 10%.

You can really start living your dream life today.